nice to meet you murphy.

"if anything can go wrong, it will." ~murphy's law.

who, ME?!?

in my pre-baby life i had some run-ins with murphy. now that baby is here, murphy visits every 5-7 minutes. awesome? well, no. not exactly. but it does keep you on your toes and teach you how to see the humor in life. these are the top 10 new rules in our life.

1. if it is inconvenient or impossible to take the baby out of his car seat, he screams. conversely, if it is convenient or possible to take him out of his car seat, he is sound asleep.

2. the baby will scream hysterically during a car ride, only bothering to fall asleep when we arrive at home.

3. the baby will happily hold the paci in his mouth when you sit with him. he will drop it the moment you walk away.

4. when you are prepared with a rag to catch spit-up, the baby will just burp. when you are entirely unprepared, the baby will barf all over you.

5. the baby will make hundreds of cute faces when the camera is in the other room. retrieve the camera and the baby just stares at you.

6. if you need the baby to sleep "just five more minutes,"so you can finish something, he will wake up. if you want the baby to wake up so you can do the 2am feeding before you drift off, he will stay asleep. 

7. when you put the baby in a cute onesie you would like to look at all day, he will happily soil it within the hour.

8. when lying on top of you (aka you cannot get anything done), the baby will sleep soundly for hours and hours. if you try to put him in his bed, he will be awake within 60 seconds.

9. the more tired the baby is, the harder it is to put him to sleep.

10. if you are early you will breeze right out the door. if you are on time or running late, the baby will gleefully provide you with a diaper explosion that will require you to change his diaper and outfit, and possibly even your outfit. the severity of the explosion is directly proportional to your tardiness.